I saw some wonderful photos of Amanda Holden on one of the morning TV chat shows today. She's glammed up to promote the Euromillions lottery and looks absolutely gorgeous. If you only saw the photos, you would think that this woman doesn't have a care in the world. You wouldn't suspect that she has recently been through the emotionally devastating loss of her baby. My first thought was complete admiration for her resilience; my second thought was that I hope people don't misinterpret Amanda's appearance as signalling that she is completely "over it."
I don't personally know Amanda Holden, Lily Allen or any other celebrities whose pregnancy losses have been in the news this past year. However I, like many others, sometimes feel like we know these people who appear on our TV or cinema screens, feature in our glossy magazines and in advertisements. It's important to realize that we can't take them at face value and infer emotions from their big smiles, worry- line free skin, slim bodies and glamourous outfits. That is their job. Not only that, but those photos are carefully choreographed and often re-touched. They are not cardboard cut-out figures. They are real women with real feelings and they are going through a process of healing, which does not happen overnight.
I hope that the gossip rags will be kind to Amanda this week as she re-enters the public domain with the Euromillions Lottery and Britain's Got Talent and as she moves forward from her loss. I hope that it also reminds us that someone in our own lives who is trying to bounce back from a significant loss or disappointment, may look better on the outside than they actually feel on the inside. Be generous with your sensitivity and give them the time and space for the healing to happen in its own time.
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